5 Things You Should Avoid telling to Your Children
Parenting is not an easy task – it comes with huge responsibilities. Although parents commit mistakes, there are ways to prevent them. One of the most difficult things to acquire as a parent is how to communicate with your child. Sometimes, parents do not realize before giving out a wrong idea or message. Phrases such as ‘You should be more like your brother’ and ‘No dessert until you finish your dinner’ and other obvious phrases can do more harm than good. Read on for some important things you should avoid while conversing with your children’s.
- Comparison with siblings or other children
Parents often compare their children with other children or siblings thinking that it helps in improving them. Comparison affects their self-esteem negatively, undermining their individuality and self-confidence. They start believing they are worthless and cannot achieve anything. Rather show that you believe in them and take opportunities to appreciate their abilities and talents.
- Threatening Terms
Resulting from parental pressures, threatening is not effective. It is not a good idea to threaten your children using phrases such as ‘Beware of the consequences’ or ‘Stop it right now, or else’. Do not teach them a skill you do not want them to acquire or use it on someone else. Do not weaken your connection with your young ones by using meaningless threats. Try offering them a safer alternative that will allow them to express their feelings without instilling fear in them. Give them an open space to share both their achievements and failures. Remember failures are the stepping stones to success.
- Demotivating Words
Use of demotivating words or consistent nagging makes your child feel incompetent. In order to prevent our children from consequences, we end up complaining and scolding them. Nagging not only make them over dependent but also harms the parent-child bond. Using demotivating phrases such as ‘You cannot do this’ wear children down instead of building their confidence. Talk to them softly and understand their concerns rather than shouting at them. Ley to have a healthy argument/conversation over any issue and give them the idea how they need to take care.
- Negative Comments
Parents expect their children to be flawless and view their differences or choices as imperfections. Labeling using negative words such as ‘loser’ or ‘brat’ kills their self-esteem. Constant repetition of negative words demotivates children shattering their self-worth. Try to be sensitive to your child’s needs.
- Unnecessary Expectations
Parents believe that they are doing good to children by applying a disciplinary action on them. They think that if constantly push them to achieve better or blackmail them, their children will appreciate it one day. However, these corrective measures or unnecessary expectations leaves a negative impact on a child’s self-esteem. Thinking it as guidance or help, parents are wrong and end up harming their children emotionally. Do not expect too much from them, talk to them like a friend. Understand your child’s limitations and encourage them to venture into newer aspects, but simultaneously show that you are there with them whatever the results are.
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